This is Me – I’m Adopted. My struggle with Rejection
Rejection talk from an Adoptee
How do you see yourself? in my opinion, I am fundamentally flawed by my adoptee status. That’s a big statement I hear you think to yourself. Agreed it certainly is a big statement. I am an older adoptee. I’m 56 not too old but certainly older. My Adoption was at 8 months old. I had been in 2 foster homes before finding my place within my adoptive family. My upbringing was a good stable environment. The only thing not stable in my family was me. I struggled greatly coming to terms with being different, chosen, special and adopted. I still don’t warm to being told I am special, to me that’s another word for your going to reject me. My parents had two children of their own I was bang slap in the middle of them. I am also an adopter, well Special Guardianshipper to be precise. All through my life, I yearned to have children. It soon became apparent that this was not going to happen naturally. I never wanted to adopt knowing the pain and fear it had caused me on the inside.
Rejection in the adoptee is 1000 times magnified or 1,000,000 times magnified – Who knows? Let’s just say without a shadow of a doubt it’s hugely magnified.
I have started this blog to share some of the ups and downs of life as an adoptee and an adopter. My own experience as an adoptee has taken me to a place where I have written my own story over two books. My books also talk about my faith and how that has helped me. With the purpose of reaching out to people in the same position as myself to encourage and inspire them to move beyond the rejection, move over the abandonment move out of angry mode and become everything you are meant to be. Being adopted is not easy on the adoptee. Over the past five years as I have researched and spoken to literally thousands of adoptees so many of us have had extreme internal difficulties with our emotional well being. Struggling to fit in at work, in groups, in relationships. I personally found starting to parent at 50 extremely difficult. I will be sharing lots of those moments.